.we talk about the perfect day.

as long as we can love each other and remember the feeling of love we had, we can die without ever really going away. all the love you created is still there. all the memories are still there. you live on – in the hearts of everyone you have touched and nurtured while you were here.

“death ends a life, not a relationship”

.we talk about forgiveness.

its not just other people we need to forgive, we also need to forgive ourselves.

yes, for all the things we didn’t do, all the things we should have done, you cant get stuck on the regrets of what should have happened. that’s doesn’t help you when you get to where i am.

.we talk about culture.

people are only mean when they are threatened and that’s what our culture does. that’s what our economy does. even people who have jobs in our economy are threatened, because they worry about losing them. and when you get threatened, you start looking out only for yourself. you start making money a god. it is all part of this culture.


here’s what i mean by building your own little subculture.

i don’t mean you disregard every rule of your community. i don’t go around naked, for example. i don’t run through red lights. the little things i can obey. but the big things – how we think, what we value – those you must choose yourself. you can’t let anyone – or any society – determine those for you.


every society has its own problems, the way to do it, isn’t to run away. you have to work at creating your own culture.

look, no matter where you live, the biggest defect we human beings have is our shortsightedness. we don’t see what we could be. we should be looking at our potential, stretching ourselves into everything we can become. but if you are surrounded by people who say ‘ i want mine now’ , you end up with a few people with everything  and a military to keep the poor ones from rising up and stealing it.

the problem is that we don’t believe we are as much alike as we are. whites and blacks, Catholics and protestants, men and women. if we saw each other as more alike, we might be very eager to join in one big human family in this world and to care about that family the way we care about our own.

.we talk about marriage.

you got tested, you find out who you are, who the other person is, and how you accommodate or don’t


there are few rules i know to be true about love and marriage. if you don’t respect the other person, you’re gonna have a lot of troubles. if you don’t know how to compromise, you are gonna have a lot of troubles. if you cant talk openly about what goes on between you, you are gonna have a lot of troubles. and if you don’t have a common set of values in life, you are gonna have a lot of troubles. your values must be alike.


“love each other or perish”

.we talk about money.

if you are trying to show off for people at the top, forget it. they will look down at you anyhow. and if you are trying to show off for people at the bottom, forget it. they will only envy you. status will get you nowhere. only an open heart can allow you to float equally between everyone.


do the kinds of things that come from the heart. when you do, you wont be dissatisfied. you wont be envious. you wont be longing for somebody else’s things. on the contrary, you’ll be overwhelmed with what comes back.